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Sunday, 20 July 2008

  • here

    the flesh is weak but he is able . . . .

    i have asked for revival, i have prayed for the movement of the holy spirit. i have planned an outreach for the first week of classes known as "incontro" - one which will hopefully bring many into the church and to salvation. i have thought about how awesome it would be if god blessed the outreach and we saw hundreds saved and plugged into local church.

    with every thought of how "awesome" it would be . . . i know there is a sacrifice . . . a laying down of my time and energy to pray. i love to pray, but i don't love to intercede. i love to ask god for things, but i don't love to war for the lost. i love to pray when i'm with others, but i don't love to pray alone. i love to pray for half and hour, but i don't love to pray for three hours. i love to pray when i'm awake, but i don't love praying when tired. i love to pray, but i don't love to intercede.

    i know it needs to be done. i know that i have to do it. i'm supposed to be a leader . . . and a leader leads by example. but as hard as i try, i can't bring my flesh to be that example. i hate myself for it. as i waste away hour after hour i think "you could be praying, doing what needs to be done, doing what a leader would do." but i don't. i try not to think about it. when i think about it i abhor myself more, because i know it needs to be done - i know there are souls on the line that someone needs to be praying for - but i don't pray.

    i know hell is real. i know satan is real. i know spiritual warfare is real. yet, even with all that knowledge i find myself giving more and more time to things that make me "feel" good and less and less time to actual prayer. prayer that goes beyond my wants and needs. prayer that seeks nothing for self, but seeks everything for him. i don't deserve to be called a leader. i'm not willing to pay the price of one. at what point will i be willing to seek the face of my creator for those who have no clue?

    i want to seek, but i can't . . . no . . . it's not that i can't . . . it's that i won't.

    my flesh is weak, but he is able . . .

Sunday, 06 July 2008

  • some days, the desire to be a film composer is so strong i sit around imagining the music i would compose . . . hearing it my head as i dream of a life as a composer.

    hmmmm . . . until then though . . . it is music like this that someday i wish to create. it's long, simple and soft, but so beautiful.

Saturday, 05 July 2008

  • happy birthday mom!

    well today (technically yesterday) was my mother's 50 birthday and to celebrate it, i wrote a poem for her. i love her dearly (although some would argue differently) but i really must give all the credit for the things people appreciate about me, to her. if not for her . . . i most definitely would not be as awesome as i am  ; )



    What My Mother Has Taught Me

    Compliments have come which always do tell
    All the things that I do well
    But it is not me who can take the praise
    It is my mother who deserves accolades


    It was not me that taught me right
    T’was my mother’s love both day and night
    That showed the way for me to go
    So that I could be helpful when I was old


    Roses are red and violets are blue
    Here are some things you taught me to do


    You taught me to clean in every which way
    The bathroom completely with little spray
    You taught me how to wash my clothes
    Teaching me the different loads


    You taught me how to can many foods
    Which in many ways is kind of cool
    All the gardens you taught me to make
    Demonstrated what it meant to wait


    Shopping sales was your big thing
    But somehow it got me like a sting
    When ever I shop if a “sale” sign not hang
    My business I take to a place I can save


    The ability to bake is my first playing card
    When impressing the women of both near and far
    Along those lines comes cooking too
    Which I must accredit, pretty much, to you


    Let us not forget the ability to sew
    It’s a handy thing for me to know
    And Ironing I’m able to do
    Only because you wanted me to


    At Christmas time you taught me well
    Decorating as if a spell
    The tree, the house, the outdoors too
    I often felt like I was a who


    Teaching me how to drive
    Was something that caused others to cry
    But you were confident in my skills
    Which almost always got us killed


    My wonderful work-ethic is not my own
    For it was you who had solely sown
    The importance of a job well done
    And not giving up even if no fun


    Whenever in a kitchen, people do say
    “What a wonderful job at cleaning this place!
    The sink, the counters, the stove top too
    Are all so clean they look brand new!”


    This I can attribute to only you
    Who taught me what it was to do
    A thorough job of cleaning that place
    Remember the kitchen – always a disgrace?


    My talent, my pride, my future and life
    The piano has been like a wife
    But it was not me who found this jewel
    It was my mother who my passion would fuel


    The musical ambitions and desires I had
    She nurtured and cared for as though a lad
    She made sure that I succeeded right
    Even though it was often a fight


    “Practice! Practice!” she often did say
    Which at the time did make me hate
    But looking back I’m a thankful man
    That she was determined and stuck to her plan


    No matter the tears and excuses I made
    She always would say “you wanted to play”
    And although it was hard and hours I sat
    I look back now and say “thanks mom for that!”


    So now on your birthday this special day fast
    Fifty years have come and passed
    Twenty of which you poured into me
    I thank you mom for loving me


    It hasn’t always been easy
    It hasn’t always been fun
    But like you said when I was young
    I’m thanking you now for your love


    Enjoy this wonderful birthday
    And I pray for fifty more
    I just want you to know mom
    I love you for who you are

Tuesday, 01 July 2008

  • While reading the news this morning, this article caught my eye.

     ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Between now and November, the Obama forces are planning as many as 1,000 house parties and dozens of Christian rock concerts, gatherings of religious leaders, campus visits and telephone conference calls to bring together voters of all ages motivated by their faith to engage in politics. It is the most intensive effort yet by a Democratic candidate to reach out to self-identified evangelical or born-again Christians and to try to pry them away from their historical attachment to the Republican Party.

    Mr. Obama is building his appeal in part on calls to heal political rifts and address human suffering. He is also drawing on his own characteristics and story, including his embrace of Christianity as an adult, a facility with biblical language and imagery and comfort in talking about how his religious beliefs animate his approach to public life.

    He also faces significant hurdles in appealing to religious voters because of his tolerance for abortion and same-sex marriage.

    Mr. Mark DeMoss, a public relations executive who represents Franklin Graham and other church leaders and conservative religious organizations, cited the meeting two weeks ago in Chicago in which Mr. Obama met privately with 30 religious leaders from many traditions and political persuasions, including several, like Mr. Graham, who were never likely to support him.

    Mr. Obama won praise for his openness to those who disagreed with him, Mr. DeMoss said, but he stood firm in his support for abortion rights and cemented opposition from those for whom that is a bedrock issue.

    Mr. Obama is also reaching out to young evangelicals, the so-called Joshua generation, a group that would seem to be a fertile ground for recruitment.

    Gabe Lyons, founder of the Fermi Project, a nonprofit group that educates church and youth leaders about Christianity and society, said many young evangelicals from the left and right had been turned off to politics.

    “Obama is doing a better job of talking about his religious views and values than John McCain is,” Mr. Lyons, 33, said. “The challenge is that the closer young evangelicals get to understanding his policies the more they will struggle with them and many will slowly back off because for them abortion is such a huge point.”

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25468930/

    (bolded for emphasis by josh mcgrath)

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    “Including his embrace for Christianity as an adult” his embrace? His embrace?? I’m sorry, but when I think about a godly leader, I don’t think of one who “embraces Christianity” . . . I think of a man who isn’t afraid to believe in ONE idea, ONE faith, ONE God . . . not a man who “embraces” them all.

    Who will stand against the social expectations of voting for Obama? Where do the lines of racism begin and the lines of politics end? We have an “embracing” leader, Obama, who holds a conference meeting with religious leaders to show his support for what? All their individual denominations? Their individual beliefs? To tell them he is a believer . . . of all their religions?

    I think the following video does a good  job of showcasing his beliefs on two important issues.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlY9HFRNUHs&feature=related

    Did you like the wording – “when I sit down and read scripture and think ‘how would Jesus feel about . . .’” Is he seriously bringing Jesus into this??

    The thing I like the most about this interview is, he ends it talking about all the things we “agree” on . . . like--children should be cared for, promoting the safety and security of the United States and giving economic opportunity to all people. This is the smooth, professional, “caring” politician that has so gracefully deceived thousands of people. It is this wolf in sheep’s skin that has caused the American people to strongly support a leader who “cares” but who is committed to killing children and pressing on for gay-rights.

    I write this to once again refresh your memory, to show you the agenda of a seemingly “great” politician who is supposedly the “change we can believe in” . . . but like so many of his predecessors, he is merely the same politician . . . just a different color.

     

     

     

    For further inquires, this helped me in my research. Not extensive by and means, but a great beginning.

    http://www.cnsnews.com/ViewCulture.asp?Page=/Culture/archive/200805/CUL20080529a.html

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BT7qhGvykiQ

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73oZ_pe1MZ8&feature=related

    http://www.cnsnews.com/ViewCulture.asp?Page=/Culture/archive/200703/CUL20070316a.html

     

     

Sunday, 29 June 2008

  • i've determined (on my own) to stay home this entire week . . . well . . . most of the week that is. i had come home from helping out at the daniel's house on wednesday, did really well and stayed home until thursday . . . and then ended back up there that night, finally arriving home this afternoon. you know, some people are addicted to drugs, coffee, chocolate, or tv shows . . . i think i'm addicted to the daniels. this may seem at first glance safe and not destructive in any way. well, there are a few side-effects from this addiction.

         first, i haven't done laundry in over a week (and i hadn't done laundry a week previously going to their house) so needless to say - i have no clean clothes. for the past several days my wardrobe has been that of two good friends.
         second, i have no clue what is going on in my own home here because i have been away for so long. i have missed the memories that were being made, the new friends that were here and the plans that have been settled.
         third, i have a hard time staying here at home without letting my mind wonder over to the daniel's house were i think to myself "i wonder what they're all doing right now?" i'm working hard on curtailing such thoughts . . . but it's hard.

    so in my attempt to return to my life here in madrid, i have requested that the daniel's don't invite me over for anything until next sunday. they have graciously agreed . . . but i think i will be over there for one evening where i hope to enjoy the wonderful delights of one wonderful girl's cooking. but nothing more than that!




    i love summer!!!! this evening i made a large batch of these . . . and by large batch i mean like five dozen. they are so tasty . . . and although it may sound like i'm a glutton for punishment by the large number made, i must assure you that before tomorrow is up . . . the house will be clear of them. i'm sitting right now in the family room, enjoying a great movie with many wonderful friends/adopted family. to know that in the morning school does not call my name . . . what joy raptures my soul and causes such smiles to spread across my face that i have a hard time suppressing my delight! but for tonight i think i will try and settle down and enjoy the comforts of this madrid home.

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